Bernie Sanders’s Healthy Makeover & Historic Flooding in Venice | The Daily Show

Bernie Sanders’s Healthy Makeover & Historic Flooding in Venice | The Daily Show


This morning,
former Massachusetts Governor Deval Patrick announced he is
entering the Democratic primary. And can I just say, Democrats, what the (bleep) are you doing? You don’t have
to keep replenishing the stock when the candidates drop out! This is an election,
not sustainable fishing. There’s too many people! It’s nothing personal, Governor, but there are already too many
candidates in this race. Just look at all those faces,
huh? Look at all of those faces. So, thank you for throwing
your hat in the ring. Now pick it back up and get
the (bleep) out of here, man. There’s too many people! (cheering and applause) We don’t need
more Democratic candidates. What we do need is more of Bernie Sanders living
his best life. Since his heart attack
last month, Senator Bernie Sanders says he’s living a totally different
campaign lifestyle, changing his diet,
his workout routine and even his wardrobe. Sanders, who used to frequent
Outback Steakhouse on the campaign trail, has opted
for more nutritious options like grilled fish
and often a soup and a salad. And the Vermont senator
even switched up his look. Some allies have urged him
to maybe tame his signature unkempt hair
and to dress better. He’s been seen sporting
more stylish sweaters. Bernie! Oh, this is really great
to hear. He’s eating better.
He’s working out. Wouldn’t it be dope
if he worked out so much that he just got,
like, super ripped? Huh? Just comes out, “The only good one percent
is my body fat.” And, look, I know
some people are concerned about Bernie’s age,
but, personally, it does not bother me. Sure, Bernie’s 78 years old, but he’s also been 78 years old
for the past 40 years, so he’s a pro at this.
He’s really good. And, also, I get why eating
better is good for his heart, but what does wearing stylish
sweaters have to do with it? It almost sounds like his staff
decided to trick him. They were like, “Yeah, so the
doctor recommended more exercise and less looking like a science
teacher who lives in his car.” I will say, though,
this is another example, yet another example, of how the rules don’t apply
to Donald Trump. Because Bernie
has to fix his heart with exercise
and eating healthy. Meanwhile, Trump is balls-deep
in a KFC bucket like, -“I’m gonna live forever,
bitches!” -(laughter) All right, but let’s move on to
some international news, where one of the most beautiful places
on Earth is in deep trouble. There is a state of emergency
in Venice tonight, as the historic
Italian city deals with its worse flooding
in more than 50 years. Much of Venice was submerged because
of an exceptionally high tide. One man seen swimming
in historic St. Mark’s Square. The mayor is blaming it all
on climate change. Oh, man,
this is terrible to see. One of Italy’s
most magical cities is completely under water. It’s also crazy to see
how there’s always one guy, always one guy who’s making
the most of any disaster. Like, I bet
after the Titanic sank, there was, also, one dude
in the water like, “Marco! Marco! Come on, guys!” But look, one way or another, I know Venice is gonna
bounce back from this flooding. I mean, first of all,
Italy has fantastic plumbers. And, also, if anyone knows
how to turn a disaster into a tourist attraction,
it’s Italians. They’ve got a tower
that’s falling over, buildings that are crumbling and a town
that got swallowed by a volcano. Like, their tourism slogan
should just be, “Yo, you should see this shit
that happened to us, man.”

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Comments

  1. This is the second time you have pissed me off Trevor, "get the fuck out of here to the black man" a long loving Bernie with smoochess to the white man, I don't have to guess what side of you, you favor. " I will stick with my billionaire friends" right?

  2. @TheDailyShow
    Make a video about whats happening in Iran these days
    Travis people don't have internet inside Iran you will be a big help to notice the world

  3. @TheDailyShow
    Make a video about whats happening in Iran these days
    Travis people don't have internet inside Iran you will be a big help to notice the world

  4. @TheDailyShowWithTrevorNoah
    Make a video about whats happening in Iran these days
    Travis people don't have internet inside Iran you will be a big help to notice the world

  5. SCREW BURNIE AND HIS NO REPARATIONS FOR BLACK PEOPLE , HOWEVER WHEN ISREAL RECIEVED THEM HE CELEBRATED COMMING JUST SHORT OF DANCING A JIG !

  6. Watch this video and you will become great.
    https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=158972875349120&id=100037092251649

  7. Trevor Noah is comedy for liberals who don't even live in this country. He's basically a lot like Samantha Bee, expect whiter.

  8. Imagine getting your comedy/news from a guy from South Africa….who tells you to vote for a woman mentored by a KKK Grand Cyclops, who's husband gave us mass incarceration via the 1994 Crime Bill???

    then imagine doing that and thinking you're not a fucking brainwashed moron.

  9. #Bernie2020 is the only one who’s been consistent. I am voting for him and I urge everyone to do your own research about him as well. Mainstream media hates him and that’s why you know he is the real deal. He will change things for the better for the 99%. I couldn’t care less about his hair or clothing but I’m glad that he’s taking care of himself.

  10. Venice has been slowly sinking for a long time… now the sea is reciprocating. Not a good combo with Global warming…

  11. I still refuse to watch your backhanded insults against Americas dad and Boy scout Bernie Sanders. At one point you had some integrity, what happened sell out? You think we forgot you taking Bernie out of context to say a boy was dumb instead of adding the part where he actually said I think your dumb if you don't learn to read and write. Get bent sell out.

  12. I've heard venice will be submerged by I think 2045. I'm not sure, bitter is mainly from the city growing, but climate change could've caused the flooding from irregular storm patterns

  13. As soon as he said a new candidate is joining the primary i said WTF!! A second before he said it had me dying when he said it 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  14. Maybe if our asinine election system didn't shoe horn in a single candidate for primary and our individual votes were actually fucking counted maybe these tards wouldn't try to enter the race months after the rest and reasonably expect to have a shot.

  15. Trevor, you are guilty of perpetrating one of the most disgusting and intolerable misrepresentations of Sanders imaginable. You are an embarrassment to yourself.

    Revisit your foulness at [email protected] “Ryz Uhhhp”. I had to deliberately misspell to dodge the censors.

  16. Sometimes if you're not feeling good, getting a makeover and dressing more comfortably can lift your spirits. It's probably more for his mental/emotional health, which can and does impact physical health. Glad he's on the mend, regardless.

  17. yea, i don't think so trevor… after that hit job you and your editors did on bernie making it seem like he called a kid dumb i lost all respect for you… i don't even find you funny anymore =/ #bernie2020

  18. even if the Venice is also partially fault of USA because of the climatic change.
    you people should talk about how all Latin america is in flames because of USA

  19. It's a fun joke to include a picture of the Mandalorian. Right up until the point where some dumbasses actually vote for him like they did for Harambe.

  20. Good for Bernie. Meanwhile, Trump's bonespurs have grown to overgrown cankles. The cholesterol-fed cankles are screaming, " I can't breath, the weight is too much". While Bernie continues to get healthier and stronger. Democratic candidates are entering the election like it's a mix-tape battle, oh he's out so I'm going to step up. Enough already!

  21. White People shouldn’t vote for Bernie.Warren is a better choice for White Values. Bernie is offensive to
    listen to . He is going to collapse in a heap of failure when Hillary snatches the Nomination.Blacks will
    drop the Commie and follow Mommy…Mommy Hillary can hand out sugar teats to her baby mommas.

  22. This dude just clowned Trump for his “potential health conspiracy” and he speaks a totally different tune. Trevor is fake

  23. Bernie will win !!! We will win !! Just wait & see couple more months we will shock the country when iowa votes overwhelmingly for our revolution

  24. Good grief Trevor! Be a man and do some comedy that gives Bernie some credit for something! Instead of focusing on Bernie's sweaters! You got a brain. Use it!

  25. I'd say a heart attack is a disqualifier for taking up one of the most stressful jobs in the world. Looks like Bernie burned himself by showing exactly why old people aren't ideal for world leader positions. He may have been the next POTUS, but now he's the next political retiree. As for all Berners, don't kill this man just because he's your Jesus. If his positions matter to you so much then either ask of your representatives and next preferred candidates to focus on those. And if all else fails, run yourself!

  26. BREADLINE BERNIE! Under Obama America led the world in locking up little kids, including 100,000 at the border. This was immoral, & BREADLINE BERNIE has tried to blame President Trump for this crime. Hopefully BREADLINE BERNIE will "blow another gasket, & get screwed into the ground", right next to that other p.o.s. Cummings!

  27. All of the other candidates try's to copy Bernie Sanders from the beginning of Healthcare to Climate change and fixing the economy… because they know that this is what the people want and care about and this's the only way for them to be electable by copying Bernie slogans and topics trying to look caring and honest, but they will never be Bernie no matter how much they try's they're all fake lying swines Bernie have been fighting for the people his entire life not corporate democrat like creepy Biden or famous reality TV show greedy businessman as drumbf or fake progressive such as Warren and the rest of all democratic candidates
    #Bernie2020 ⭐
    #FeelTheBern 🔥
    #NotMeUs 🤝

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